Fascinating how, no matter how secular a Jew may be, there are some things everyone knows.
Like, Jews don’t have baby showers.
Has your Jewish grandmother ever done odd things like spit when someone offers her beautiful grandbaby a compliment? Or say stuff like, “poo poo poo!!” Or tie a red string around the crib?
If so, congrats. You are part of the K9 Hora club. And, uh, no relation to the “hora” that you dance at a bar mitzvah.
Let’s start with some ulpan.
The phrase K9 Hora actually stems from three words smushed together (is smushed a Yiddish word too? When I was little I always thought “smorgasbord” and “farfetched” were Yiddish) – and I’d like to credit my source – a very cute kenohora article right here. And just try to google kenohora – there about 613 ways to spell it.
Which is why I like my way: K9 Hora. It almost looks English.
So the three words are: kein, the Yiddish word for no or negating, ayin, Hebrew for eye, and hara, Hebrew for Evil.
What is an Evil Eye? Are Jews superstitious?? Is God out to get us? Why does Madonna wear a red string?
In order:
I’ll tell you.
No.
No.
And on principle, I don’t speak for Madonna.
What’s an Evil Eye?
Jews generally earn the Divine Protection of G-d – by default. Not necessarily because we earn it, but because He loves us. However, there are some ways to invalidate this protection, and one of them is by flaunting our blessings in a way that makes others uncomfortable or envious. In a way that is excessive. Then G-d pulls out His ledgers and checks us out. Audits us. And may very well say: “Hey – if you don’t really deserve your blessings, but no one’s getting hurt… OK. But if your being in-your-face with My gifts, I may have to retract them.”
So this is called the Evil Eye – of other people in our lives, viewing our gifts with a negative eye. Now, if there’s anything smart Jews want to do, it’s protect their assets. So us Jews have gone completely extreme with protecting ourselves from Evil Eye – in some interesting ways.
Like when someone compliments your beautiful granddaughter, to spit and say, “Ew! She’s so ugly!” which is code for “Get your evil eyes far away from me!”
This is not really my way.
The Torah states that if you buy into being victim to this whole dynamic, you will, indeed become susceptible to it. And if you don’t, if you trust G-d, act normal, don’t flaunt your blessings, and share your goodness with others, you will continue to merit G-d’s Divine Protection.
It’s might seem easier, though, to just omit the baby shower, hang up a hamsa, wear a red string. But those are shortcuts – not accessing the real state of faith that offers protection from the Evil Eye.
By the way, this is also why some people won’t share news of a pregnancy till it’s obvious or say how many kids or grandkids they have, and why some will otherwise downplay their blessings.
Me, I prefer to say “Thank G-d.” It’s positive – and focuses on my gratitude. With Divine assistance, this will be the protection I need.
If I were to start a Jewishly-themed doggy obedience school, I would totally name it "K9 Hora." Just sayin'.
I'm always amazed by people who claim, with seemingly utter sincerity, that various Jewish customs are not superstitions, Take this recent posting for Daily Halacha: The Zohar Ha’kadosh, in Vayikra (p. 24), writes that when a harsh judgment is issued against a person, Heaven forbid, his fingers will unwittingly begin moving, and the fingers of his two hands will become interlocked. As interlocking hands is a sign of harsh judgment, it is improper for a person to intentionally hold his hands in this position.
It concludes:
There are many warnings of this kind that we hear as children, and many people are unable to distinguish between those that stem from folklore and superstition, and those which have a clear basis in Jewish tradition. When it comes to interlocking fingers, this is a well-documented warning that originates already from the Zohar and the teachings of the Arizal.
This is great, Ruchi. Rabbi Refson at Neve told us a similar thing: If you don't "believe" in the power of ayin hara, it can't touch you. Like you, I choose to say "Baruch Hashem – Thank G-d," when people compliment me on, well, anything. After all, it's Hashem who gave me the cute kids/talent/whatever in the first place.
I do like the Jewish way of being more modest or guarded with our blessings though, as it is oftentimes more sensitive to those who are perhaps not experiencing certain blessings (children, parnossa, etc).
Interesting post. I like the auditing metaphor. Personally I think the exact wording someone says doesn't always make so much of a difference–whether they seem humble or arrogant also has a lot to do with their tone of voice, whether they are just politely answering a question or getting in your face to brag about it, stuff like that.
The poll is cute too, by the way!
very interesting, Lenny. I know that the Lubavitcher Rebbe was very strict about not interlocking fingers – now I know a little bit why.
I am crazy-superstitious about some things, for example I didn't even buy one diaper until each child was officially born and healthy, let alone put up the crib 🙂 But in general I think the positive "thank God" is a really nice way of giving credit where credit is due, rather than solely focusing on the fear. Although K9 Hora has been known to be heard from me when it comes to my kids, or anyone's really 🙂
My grandmother only wanted to know why for goodness sakes I wasn't putting a red string on my babies. I figured their blood is red, so it's all built in, right?
http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v4334/30/112/628681693/n628681693_2626831_3187581.jpg
I usually just cover all my bases with Thank God, kainayinhara, poo poo poo. 😛
Really though this post was both hilarious and insightful! This goes up in my top ten favs just because of this line:
"And on principle, I don't speak for Madonna."
LOL love it.
Anonymous, that picture is perfect!!
Tzipporah, so happy when people laugh at my jokes 🙂
This is too funny – Indians have the same superstitions about the evil eye, it would seem. I remember as a child if someone complimented me or my brother, the first thing my mom would do when we got home was to put a mark from her eye pencil on us, to ward off the evil eye. On a message board I'm part of, a Jewish mom made reference to something similar, leading to a number of very confused posters. I saw the post before she had a chance to respond and explained that they were likely superstitious about the evil eye – which she then confirmed! I love the funny little things that are commonalities to both cultures (I grew up around lots of Jews, so I'm familiar with many customs) :).