I have a box inside my heart
But it’s too small to see
And when I have a hurt too big
It lives inside of me
A hurt that I can’t fix or change
A hurt I cannot bear
I softly lay it in my box
And then it can’t come near

And once upon a while
I go into my box
I hold it gently in my hands
I open up its locks.
I take my hurts out carefully
I wallow in each one
I cry and wail and shudder
As loud as can be done.
I say “why me?” “I can’t!”
“But others are all spared!”
And many other useless things
But I no longer care.

And when my soul is spent,
My final shudder heaved
My heart slows down to normal
And my tears begin to cease.
I take my hurts and kiss them
I wish them all goodbye
I put them back inside my box
And tell a little lie:
“I’ll miss you, hurts, I will!
Be well till next time, hear?
It may be just a week
It may be till next year!”

The truth is I won’t miss them
I shut them out of mind
Till something grabs me unawares
And then, those tears of mine…
They unlock that small box
With none of my permission
And all my hurts escape
Against my intuition.
The pain is on my face,
where no one’s meant to seek
But hurts in boxes can’t just stay
They sometimes have to leak.

Now I will guard my box
As closely as I do
But if my hurts escape, well…
Tears are human too.