There are 6 fast days on the Jewish calendar:

The man, the woman, the long, the short, the black, the white.

Man: Fast of Gedalya (day after Rosh Hashanah)
Woman: Fast of Esther (day before Purim)
Long: Shiva Asar B’Tammuz – longest because of the number of daylight hours (it’s in July)
Short: Asara B’Teves – fewest daylight hours (January)
Black: Tisha B’Av – blackest, most mournful day on our calendar
White: Yom Kippur – white for purity, cleansing, and repentance

Do you dread Yom Kippur?  I do too, sometimes.  In my immature moments I dread the fasting and high expectations of prayer.  In my more mature moments, I welcome the opportunity to truly dust off the cobwebs and stand bravely to face my demons.

And in my most mature moments, I dread it again, wondering if I’ve overestimated myself.

Yom Kippur looks white.  It’s quiet.  People walking to services, from services, dressed simply.  They’re quiet. It’s a serious day.  Nothing else matters.

It smells fresh, like after a good rain.

It tastes metallic, from fasting.

It sounds like a rush of the ocean in prayer, the melody swelling and falling like the tide.

It feels like the pages of my machzor (holiday prayerbook).   Turning, turning, turning.  I’m cold, from not eating.  I pull my sweater close around me.

That was in my youth.

Now, I care for my kids.  Teach at JFX.  Run to catch a small morsel of the service at shul (synagogue).  I grab it like the hungry woman I am.  Try not to kvetch about the fasting; that’s SO not what it’s about.

Hope I’m using the hours well, as they tick, tick, tick away…